2005-07-27 14:43:48

Golf Gloat

Just ignore this blog entry.  I had a good morning on the golf course and I want to remember every detail.  This has nothing to do with software.

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The University of Illinois has two golf courses, the Blue and the Orange.  I consider the Orange course to be absurdly difficult.  Most of the greens are elevated and all of them are curvier than a cheerleader.  There's sand, water and trees all over the place.  To make matters worse, I'm a terrible golfer.

Every time I play the front nine on the Orange course, my goal is to shoot a 54 (double-bogey golf).  In dozens of attempts, I have never succeeded.  I routinely shoot around 57 or so.  But today, I shot a 53, as follows:

1. Hole #1, par 5, 542 yards.  3-wood into the first cut of rough on the right.  Decent.
2. Good 3-iron, mostly straight ahead, in the fairway.
3. Terrible 3-iron, off to the right into the trees.  My companions start diagnosing my swing problems.
4. Fabulous shot.  I chopped a 3-iron under a tree branch and over a sand trap.  It rolled onto the green and stayed on the fringe.  The guys on the PGA couldn't have done this shot any better, although none of them would have been in this stupid situation in the first place.
5. Putt onto the green.  (What psychopath chose today's pin placement on the slope in the back?)
6. Putt
7. Short putt for double bogey.  That's a fine score for me on this hole.
8. Hole #2, par 3, 163 yards over water.  Terrible tee shot.  I somehow got my 5-wood way under the ball and popped it up high and short.  Another 10 feet and I would have made it all the way to the women's tee box.
9. Duffed my 7-iron into the water.
10. Penalty stroke
11. Pitching wedge to the fringe
12. Putt onto the green
13. Putt
14. Short putt for a quadruple bogey 7.  At this point I am preparing myself for a bad day.
15. Hole #3, par 4, 376 yards, dogleg around a grove of trees.  Tee shot with 3-wood was okay.  Anything that doesn't slice into the trees is a good shot.
16. Good 3-iron, mostly straight ahead, over the fairway traps, short of the green.
17. Pitch onto the green, just glad to miss the sand.
18. Putt.  Why are these greens so fast when it rained last night?
19. Putt
20. Putt for a double bogey.
21. Hole #4, par 5, 561 yards dogleg around a lake which always seems to attract my ball like a magnet.  3-wood to the first cut of rough on the right.
22. Good 3-iron, still in the rough, but not in the lake.
23. Horrible shot.  The lake should not even have been a factor, but I completely duff my 3-iron.  It goes straight toward the lake and luckily hits a tree, staying dry.
24. Chop out into the fairway.
25. Another bad shot with the 3-iron.  Slice off to the right, hits another tree, and bounces luckily back into the fairway.
26. Pitching wedge just misses the green.
27. Miracle shot with a pitching wedge goes into the cup.  I deserved a 10 on this hole, so I take my double-bogey 7 with a sheepish grin and move on.
28. Hole #5, par 4, 417 yards.  Mediocre tee shot with my 3-wood, short and in the first cut on the left.  I don't think I've hit a fairway all morning.
29. Lay up with a 7-iron, just short of the creek.
30. 5-iron toward the green, missed right.
31. Pitch onto the green, too far, left myself a long downhill putt back.
32. Made the putt for a bogey 5.  The momentum has turned in my direction.
33. Hole #6, par 3, 154 yards.  Used a half swing with my 3-wood, just missed the green left.
34. Pitch onto the green.
35. Putt
36. Putt for a bogey 4.
37. Hole #7, par 4, 365 yards.  3-wood popped up high, kind of short, in the first cut of rough on the right.
38. Awesome 3-iron, 20 yards in front of the green.
39. The pin is in the back today, so I play bump and run with a 5-iron, up the steep green.  My ball rolls just off the green into the fringe.
40. Putt onto the green.
41. Putt for bogey 5.
42. Hole #8, par 4, 347 yards.  Another high tee shot with the 3-wood.  What's wrong with me today?  At least I'm in the fairway.
43. Lay up with a 7-iron, just short of the water.
44. Lame shot with the pitching wedge, through the green to the fringe.
45. Putt onto the green.
46. Putt
47. Putt for a double bogey 6.
48. Hole #9, par 4, 418 yards.  Decent 3-wood, first cut of rough on the right.
49. Weird hit with the 3-iron, but enough length, left side of the fairway.
50. Bump and run with the 5-iron again, pin high on the green.
51. Putt
52. I should have made this easy 4-footer, but I read too much break.
53. Putt for a double bogey 6.

So there it is.  A lot of mediocre shots and a few very lucky ones.  :-)